Cassie Minicucci
MADAM, IT IS MY PAINFUL DUTY TO INFORM YOU THAT A REPORT HAS THIS DAY BEEN RECEIVED FROM THE WAR OFFICE
i.
your hands, hot on the waist of my empire gown.
cherry buns sugar our tongues, champagne chimes
lazily down our throats. whalebone rubs red lines
in my cinched skin, but i can’t find it in myself to frown.
green ink on sacred parchment, our promises hallowed
in signatures and dates. the eleventh month, the eleventh day.
my lucky number, you whisper in my ear. i know the way
home, but i feel a queen when you carry me down the dirt road.
i see our life in your eyes. golden rings, mouths warm with wine
from amber bottles. bramley apples dripping from a grove fat
in flower, a wooden farmhouse with a white swing sat
on the stoop. the laughter of a little girl echoing in the skyline.
she runs into your arms, you lift her to the stars. i can feel
the way you love her. unmade memories, but i swear they’re real.
ii.
my hands, hidden in the clammy folds of my chemise.
you sit at the table, shoulders up and hitched, but i don’t dare
to reach for you. my ribs twist and i hover, locked in silent prayer.
but i should know. there are no gods here, only my barren please.
a draft card bent between your white fingers, frigid in the chill.
your gaze dull, fear shuttered up somewhere behind your eyes.
the space between us, brittle. i fear if i breathe wrong, i’ll break the ties
binding me to you. so i hover. a lemon dries and puckers on the window sill.
something has gone hollow. the not-memories in my mind stiffen, turn
to question me. i can feel the little girl stop laughing, tears welling
in wide eyes. she is falling, the stars she tried to touch blighting.
there’s a bitterness in my mouth where they used to burn.
i feel like i’m behind museum glass. helpless, watching you stare.
sometimes, when the shadows shift, i think you’re still sitting there.
Cassie Minicucci lives and writes in the Pacific Northwest, where she attends Reed College. She is the winner of the 2023 Mary Barnard Poetry Contest and was shortlisted for the 2023 Oxford Poetry Prize.